Office Humour

Jokes about the funnier side of working in an office can help relieve stress at the workplace . Why don't you take the time to enjoy some office humour ? 

Jokes:

Question - How many people work in this office?      Answer - About half of them. 

Usually the staff of the company play football. The middle level managers are more interested in tennis. The top management usually has a preference for golf. Finding (Hallazgo)- As you go up the corporate ladder (escalera) , the balls reduce in size. 

Some memorable lines: 

 Never be indispensable. If you can't be replaced, you will never get promoted.

 Statistics are like a lamp-post to a drunken man - more for leaning on ( para  apoyarse)  than illumination.

 When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.

 To err is human, to really foul things up ( liarlo todo )   requires a computer.

And finally some corporate terminology ! 

Competitive salary : We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

Casual work atmosphere: (ambiente de trabajo informal )  We don't pay you enough to expect that you'll dress nicely.

Some overtime required : Some time each night and some time each weekend.

Apply in person: If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the position has been filled.

Seeking candidates with a wide experience (buscando candidatos con amplia experiencia)  : You'll need it to replace the three people who just left.

Problem-solving skills a must: You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.

Requires team leadership skills : You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.

                                                                                                     Author(s) unknown .