A Canadian English Story

Have you read anything in Canadian English before? You probably haven’t. Well, let’s read a conversation between Kevin (a Canadian) and William (an Englishman) that incorporates many examples of Canadian English slang ( highlighted  in red ). In the conversation, William already knows some colloquial Canadian, but still has problems understanding the language that Kevin uses.  

 William: Hi Kevin. How’s it going?
Kevin: Oh, I feel logey¹ today. I prolly² had too many drinks last night at The Ballet³. I don’t remember how many. Prolly half a suitcase⁴. 
William: Yes, you do look tired. What did you see at the ballet? Swan Lake? The Nutcracker?
Kevin: Oh no. It wasn’t that kind of ballet. No this was the exotic dance bar club downtown.(centro)
William: Oh right. Well, you must be starving.(muriendo de hambre ) Let’s buy something from the Loblaws grocery store.(colmado ) There’s only homo milk⁵ in the fridge.
Kevin: What, from blahs blahs⁶? That’ll take too long. I think we should decide between McRats⁷ and the Dirty Bird⁸.
William: Oh, you mean McDonalds and Kentucky Fried Chicken. Yes, let’s go to the Dirty Bird. 
Kevin: Good choice (buena elección ). They got some delicious desserts on the menu these days. Last time I had beaver tail⁹.
William: What’s that? I hope you weren’t eating part of a beaver.(castor)
Kevin: Oh no, it’s nothing to do with eating a beaver. It’s a type of pastry  in the shape  of a beaver’s tail. Some people call it an elephant’s ear¹⁰. 
William: Ah! You learn something every day.
Kevin: Oh no. I hardly ( apenas) have any money. I’ve only got a fin¹¹. I hope you’ve at least  got a double sawbuck¹².
William: I don’t know.  How much is a fin and a double sawbuck?
Kevin: Oh sorry, yes, that’s Canadian English again. Yes a fin is five dollars, while a double sawbuck is twenty dollars.
William: Oh Ok. Yeah, that’s no problem mate (colega). I’m tickey boo¹³ with money. I’ve just received this month’s wages.(salario)
Kevin: Excellent. I think I’ve decided what I’m going to have. A double-double¹⁴ and a jam buster¹⁵.  Well, just wait a minute. William. I’ll just get some joggers¹⁶ on before we go.


 In the table below we can see definitions of the Canadian English expressions used in the Kevin-William conversation: 

Canadian English	Definition
1. Logey	Tired
2. Prolly	A substitution word for probably
3. The Ballet	An exotic dance club or strip bar
4. Suitcase	A case of 24 bottles of beer
5. Homo milk	Abbreviation form of homogenised milk
6. Blahs blahs	Slang name for the Canadian grocery chain store (cadena de tiendas)  called Loblaws
7. McRats	Other name for McDonalds. Other names for this fast food restaurant are Animal Recycler, Rotten Ronnies, McDogFoods.
8. Dirty Bird	Nickname (apodo ) for Kentucky Fried Chicken
9. Beaver Tail	A dessert food basically consisting of a pastry, usually covered with lemon juice and cinnamon ( canela)  sugar. Given its name because it resembles the shape of a beaver’s tail.
10. Elephant’s Ear	Other name for a beaver’s tail
11. Fin	A five dollar note, also known as a fiver
12. Double Sawbuck	A twenty dollar note (billete )
13. Tickey Boo	Everything is going well
14. Double-double	A coffee with double cream and double sugar
15. Jam buster	A jam doughnut
16. Joggers	Another word for tracksuit bottoms( pantalón de chandal )