Dumb blonde jokes

Blonde hair is often associated with "bimbos" (a young woman considered to be attractive but not intelligent ) . There is a whole category of jokes that focus on this group : blonde “bimbos “ who have little common sense (sentido común) and academic intelligence. Here are some examples and we hope you are not offended if you are a blonde woman !

* What do you call a brunette (morena) between two blondes ? An interpreter.

*There was this bar and in the bar there was a magic mirror (espejo mágico ) If you told a lie (dices una mentira) it would suck you in (aspira dentro) .

One day a brunette walked into this bar. She walked up to the mirror and said 'I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world' and it sucked her in.

The next day a redhead (pelirroja)walked into the bar. She walked up to the mirror and said

'I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world' and it sucked her in.

Then the next day a blonde walked into the bar. She walked up to the mirror and said

'I think...' ( creo /pienso (que) ..) and it sucked her in.

Do you know any dumb blonde jokes ? Tell us !

National Geographic

The National Geographic Society, a non-profit organization, “has been inspiring people to care about the planet since 1888” by spreading “geographic knowledge while promoting the conservation of the world's cultural, historical, and natural resources.” Its renowned magazine has been captivating [1] readers for years. Although you may have never read this magazine, you should have no problem recognizing its logo, the yellow rectangular frame.

If you were one of those people who only read the captions [2] underneath the breathtaking [3] photos, now it’s time to take advantage of National Geographic’s website where you can find various videos related to adventure, environment and wildlife, among others, in order to tune [4] your ear while learning interesting stuff!

Take this video, called Bear Attack, further down for example. Before listening to the video, familiarize yourself with the words below that will appear in the video.

hiking, hacienda senderismo

startled, asustado

surprise, pillar desprevenido

run away, fugarse

fight back, contraatacar

play dead, finger la muerte

charging, arremeter contra

swipes, golpes

move away, alejarse

bruised and bloody, magullado y ensangrentado

[1] cautivador, [2] pie de foto, [3] impresiopnantes, [4] afinar

Come on ! Cough up !

It’s your turn to buy the drinks-come on, cough up ! (Es tu turno de comprar las bebidas, apoquina,suelta la mosca ! ).

.

We use this phrasal verb "to cough up (something) " when you provide money or information , especially when you are not willing to do this !( no te apetece hacerlo) But don’t worry. You won’t have to cough up (pronounced /kof/ ) any money to do the following exercise !

Where or when would you pay the following ? Read the definition first.

The rent

A bill

Taxes

A Fee

A fare

A fine

Definition

Rent : a fixed amount of money that you pay regularly for the use of a room, house, car... Taxes: money paid to the government Fees: an amount of money paid for a particular piece of worker service. Fare: the money that you pay for a journey on a vehicle . A fine: an amount of money that has to be paid for not obeying a rule or law . A bill: request for payment of money . (Cambridge Dictionary )

Answers

The rent: you pay a rent for a room, flat. A bill: at a restaurant, the phone bill/gas bill/ electricity bill Taxes: the tax on cigarettes, VAT (Value -added tax= IVA) , Fees: lawyer’s fee, university fees, Fare: a train fare, a bus fare A fine: a parking fine .

Let's Call the Whole Thing Off

Call something off [1]means to cancel it. Call the whole thing off [2] means to completely end it all. The title of the light-hearted [3] duet Let's Call the Whole Thing Off, written by George and Ira Gershwin, refers to breaking up a relationship [4]. The couple singing is always disagreeing and arguing. But by the end, they realize that they can’t live without each other and agree to disagree!

What makes this song amusing are the different accents of the words they disagree about. The first pronunciation is an American accent and the second is British. See if you can notice the difference!

This song was first performed [5] by Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers in the movie Shall We Dance (1937). But the version below is sung by Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong.

Things have come to a pretty pass. Our romance is growing flat,

For you like this and the other. While I go for this and that,

Goodness knows what the end will be. Oh I don't know where I'm at.

It looks as if we two will never be one. Something must be done:

You say either and I say either, You say neither and I say neither
Either, either, neither, neither, Let's call the whole thing off.

You like potato and I like potato, You like tomato and I like tomato
Potato, potato, tomato, tomato, Let's call the whole thing off

But oh, if we call the whole thing off Then we must part
And oh, if we ever part, then that might break my heart

So if you like pyjamas and I like pyjamas, I'll wear pyjamas and give up pyajamas
For we know we need each other so we, Better call the whole off off
Let's call the whole thing off.

You say laughter and I say laughter, You say after and I say after
Laughter, laughter, after, after, Let's call the whole thing off,

You like vanilla and I like vanilla, You saspiralla, and I saspirella
Vanilla, vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, Let's call the whole thing off

But oh if we call the whole thing of then we must part
And oh, if we ever part, then that might break my heart

So if you go for oysters and I go for oysters, I'll order oysters and cancel the oysters
For we know we need each other so we,

Better call the calling off off. Let's call the whole thing off.

You say either and you say either, You say neither and you say neither
Either, either, neither, neither, Let's call the whole thing off.

You like potato and you like potato, You like tomato and you like tomato
Potato, potato, tomato, tomato, Let's call the whole thing off

But oh, if we call the whole thing off Then we must part
And oh, if we ever part, then that might break my heart

So if you like pyjamas and you like pyjamas, I'll wear pyjamas. You got pyjamas
For we know we need each other so we, Better call the whole off off
Let's call the whole thing off. Let's call the whole thing off.

[1] cancelar, suspender, [2] dejamoslo de una vez, acabomos con todo esto, [3] alegre, [4] romper una relación, [5] interpretada

Make and do

The two verbs 'do' and 'make' are often confused. The meanings are similar, but there are differences.

We use the verb 'do' to express daily activities or jobs. (activities)

do the shopping , do housework

We use 'make' to express an activity that creates something that you can touch.( construct, produce, create , manufacture)

make a cup of tea ,make a cake

Why do you make love but do good ?

There are fixed expressions that are best learnt as a whole because there is no absolute rule about which verb to use. What you need is practice...so here we go !

Make : make a complain, make a mistake, make a trip, make money, make a noise , make a phone call.

Do: do an exercise, do a crossword puzzle, do reserch, do business, do good, do a dance .

Now test yourself !!

1-Late night parties often____________a lot of noise.

2-Don’t forget to_________________ the washing up after lunch.

3- I want to______________ a complaint about the slow service in this cafe.

4-He’s thinking of_______________________a trip to Cuba.

5-He had to go and__________________a phone call.

6- Who’s going to________________ the coffee ?

7- Some people here love _______________________grammar exercises.

8- I hurt my back while I was____________my exercises in the gym.

9- When Susan first took the job as a secretary , she used to ____a lot of mistakes. It took her two years to ______her job well.

Now check your answer: 1- make 2-do 3- make 4- making 5- make 6- make 7- doing 8- doing 9-make,do .